Session Four: Day 5

Hi All,

I spent the better part of yesterday updating my blog. When we returned from Gilda's Club last night I was ready to do the final 'touch up' and send it out. Just before I finished, all but the last two lines disappeared. I spent about an hour and a half, reading 'help' info and finally acknowledged, "My words were not to be recovered."

Here's a very quick synopsis: Thursday was Treatment 4. I had another allergic reaction to Taxotere in spite of a 15% reduction and slower infusion. It was handled very well by the oncology staff. It was a long day, we started at 11:00am and left the center a little after 5:00pm with four more hours of cold caps needed at home. I felt good and was able to eat a Middle Eastern Restaurant take out.

Day 2: Friday was good. I mostly felt well, did some chores around the house, got my Neulasta shot around 4:30pm and walked afterwards. We limited our walk on the golf course to a little over a mile because it seemed like the prudent thing to do--although I felt fine, enjoyed being outdoors and chatting with Betsey.

Day 3 (Saturday): I woke up feeling like Raggedy Anne--no/zip/zero energy and achy. I tried my best to convince myself that I needed to get some exercise even if it was walking up the stairs, across the house and back down--couldn't make myself do it. This was one of those "One Day at a Time" days.

Day 4 (Sunday): I woke up feeling like I was going to live. Today was better, a little more energy and less aches. I'm feeling like a wimp. The most difficult part of this is watching what the meds are doing to my body. I struggle with how this can help me to get better. It's the Neulasta shot that seems to be the toughest on my body.

Day 5 (Monday): I'm feeling much better and know that I'm 'going in the right direction'. I attended a talk in the evening at Gilda's Club (Royal Oak) on Inflammation. It was excellent. I'll write more about it later this week.

Day 6: (Tuesday): I'm doing well. Don has a routine cardio checkup today. I'll be going with him and then doing some needed grocery shopping.

Here's a note that was sent to me both Saturday and yesterday from a website that I subscribe to: (I've never received the same note twice before and have found no pattern as to how often they're sent).

"On this day of your life, dear friend ...that any frustration you have is simply the result of wrong thinking.  If you were thinking rightly you could not possibly imagine that anything was going 'wrong.' You would know that nothing in the Universe is working against you. By definition, given Who You Are, this is impossible. Move, then to gratitude when you encounter your frustrations. And see every event as an Opportunity. You know exactly why you received this message today.

So, I've changed my thinking, accepted Saturday and yesterday's frustrations as opportunities--which I already know they have been. It's amazing what a change in words can bring.

A BIG thank you to all that wrote to tell me about what's happening with yourselves and your families. We thoroughly enjoyed hearing your stories. I hope to respond to them later in the week. Some were especially interesting and have piqued my curiosity.

I plan to write about some new things I've discovered that have helped me during my tough days. I'm learning much about my body and ways to help it to take care of itself--not something that I was searching for...but certainly worthwhile knowing.

Hope all of you are doing well and enjoying the beautiful sunshine that we've had these past several days. We're so fortunate that the sun shines into our home through different windows depending on the time of the year and the time of day. It's a huge uplift when I've been confined to the indoors.

Thanks for you prayers, good wishes, positive energy and hugs--they're working.    regards,  Joey/Josetta

Session 3: Day 15

Hi All,  (this was written over the past ten days)

Hope all of you in Michigan are enjoying our almost 60-degree weather. I believe that Spring is just around the corner.  My pansies have started growing and life is returning to our part of the world. Today the rain is nurturing growth. I know, I'd rather have the sunshine but too much of anything doesn't work. My Dad's mantra was, "Everything in Moderation". I agree with his observation even though I'm not a fan of rainy days.

I've been doing well this session. My blood work early on showed that my liver was doing much better--only one enzyme slighted elevated. I've had some peripheral neuropathy in my fingers and feet, more this time than previous sessions. I've found that walking and exercising relieves some of  the symptoms of numbness in my fingers and the strange sensation in my feet (they feel like they're rounded and challenge my balance when walking).

I've also had some respiratory changes this session. When I'd take a deep breath it was difficult, I'd have a need to cough. I started using the "breath exerciser" every day that I was given in the hospital after my breast surgery in November. I also drank a large pot of tea every day -- a mixture of green tea and "Breathe Easy" herb tea. The tea relieved my symptoms considerably.

This session:  NO bloody noses, no sore throats, no intestinal tract issues, no reproductive tract issues.  YEA!  I attribute that to taking probiotics religiously--more right after my treatments and gradually tapering off.  I mentioned in a previous blog that I'm taking capsules containing "billions" rather than "millions" of good bacteria that we need in our guts. Detroit Public Television (channel 56) has a great show explaining The Road to Perfect Health with Brenda Watson, March 26, 11:00am explaining the importance of probiotics for good health.

I''m also experiencing less stamina/energy--although I am probably still at a normal level for most 69-year-olds. I'm tired at the end of a day. On the days when I walk (usually two miles), not much gets done after dinner except relaxation. That's much different for me.

I've learned to start the day with things that are important to me--when I have the most energy. As a result, I've been going through photos on our old computer and saving special ones on to DVD's. It's been a joy to view photos and recall many gatherings and vacations of the early years of this century. I'm also organizing my computers and doing needed backups. I've been doing the same with paper files. I'm no where near "done", but working at it.

I'm putting together a photo collage, "The Wood Family 2010". The finished product will be 20"x30". I can use up to 30 photos. I'll have it printed at Costco. I've gone from 4,500 photos to 200...only 170 more to eliminate!

I'm also working on two photo books: A vacation that I took in 2007 with seven other women on a NarrowBoat (60' by 6'6") when we cruised the Stratford-Upon-Avon Canal of England--which was surrounded with wild flowers, baby animals, ducks, swans and beautiful countryside filled with charm and character. The canal has towpaths that were used by the horses which pulled the original boats 200 years ago when the canals were built. We had to pilot the boat by ourselves (I was known as "Tiller Girl) and open and close the old manual locks (7' wide), fill or empty them, do our own cooking, etc. It was certainly a challenge and an absolutely wonderful experience. I was the only gal from the U.S.  It's titled, "A Narrow Boat and a Gaggle of Women".

The 2nd book I'm working on is "Sophia, 2010"--her visits with us. I've been pretty good about doing a book a year for her. When Sophie moved out of state when she was two, a friend suggested that I put together a photo album after each visit as a reminder of good times together. I thought it was an excellent suggestion since much of what I remember from my childhood is based on photographs. Gradually I changed from photo albums to photo books that I put together on my computer and have printed by VioVio.com or Blurb.com.

I'd also like to do a photo book of our car trip to California and back that Don and I did in the fall of 2009. I kept a blog so all the photos and words are organized and 'ready to go'. The last photo book that is 'calling me' is my one month I traveled in Morocco.  It was an incredible experience filled with wonderful, unusual adventures--the five days in the desert were memorable along with the people, architecture, food and bazaars.

So, what's keeping all of you busy? I'd love to hear your stories. Send me an email or respond to this post. Thanks to all who have been doing that. I'm reading all of your emails and gradually responding.

I had my doctor's appointment yesterday (Tuesday). My blood levels were good--white blood cell count in the normal range, hemoglobin slightly below the low range. The liver tests will be available this afternoon. She also did a test that has something to do with fluid retention thinking that might be connected with what's going on in my lungs. I also had a chest x ray yesterday. I just read that the Neulasta shot that I get the day after my chemo treatments to boost my bones to produce more white blood cells can cause respiratory problems. Like most of life's choices--there are advantages and disadvantages...

My next chemo treatment is tomorrow (Thursday). Dr. Jasti is reducing the amount of Taxotere that I get by 10/15%. It's the Taxotere that causes most of the permanent side effects. It also will be given at a slower pace to prevent an allergic reaction.

Hope all of you are doing well, staying healthy and enjoying each day.  Thanks again for all your prayers, good wishes and wonderful energy that you're sending our way.  
warm regards and hugs,  Josettantryside, and past pubs, cottages and warehouses.

Rochester Relay for Life Research Project (CPS-3)

How many times have you said, "I wish I could do more"?  Well, you can!

The American Cancer Society Relay for Life of Greater Rochester is gearing up for it's June 25/26 fun and fund-raising program at Hart Middle School.

Research Study CPS-3:
This year the Rochester Relay for Life will offer community members a unique opportunity to enroll in a new research study called the Cancer Prevention Study-3 (CPS-3) at the event. The American Cancer Society is inviting men and women between the ages of  30 and 65 years who have never been diagnosed with cancer (not including basal or squamous cell skin cancer) to join this historic research study.  The study aims to enroll adults from various racial/ethnic backgrounds from across the U.S.

Individuals need to be willing to make a long-term commitment to the study.  Those who choose to enroll will complete a brief initial questionnaire and provide a waist measurement and a small blood sample.  Participants will periodically be sent a follow-up questionnaire for the next 20 to 30 years.  By joining CPS-3, participants can help the American Cancer Society understand how to prevent cancer, which could save lives and give people more of their most precious resource--time.

I highly encourage you to take part in this research project. Hart Middle School is located at 6500 Sheldon Road, Rochester Hills, 48306 (east of Rochester Road and north of Tienken).  Enrollment for the Research Study CPS-3 will take place Saturday, June 25, 2011 from 4:00pm - 8:000pm.  Or contact, Katie Brennan at 248.663.3436

For information regarding enrollment for the CPS-3 study at the Relay for Life of Rochester Event, please email: cps3.rochestermi@gmail.com.    For more information on the study itself or to find other locations across the U.S. with 2011 enrollments, visit  http://www.cancer.org/cps3  or call toll free:  1.888.604.5888.

The purpose of the study is to better understand the factors (lifestyle, environment, genetic) that cause or prevent cancer.  Do your part to further efforts in eliminating cancer as a major health concern for future generations!    hugs,  Josetta

Session 3: Day 5

Hi All,

THANKS for your encouraging words of hope...and your blessings and prayers.

I've had a couple of rough days Saturday and Sunday. I'm feeling this morning like I'm starting to get over the hump. Each time it's a little different -- I get through something that challenged me the previous session and then hit another head on. I mostly slept, drank, went to the bathroom, watched a little TV, repeat, repeat...  I had a little fever and was weak and tired. At least I'm content sleeping and laying around -- that's  pretty amazing for me! 

During the night, my heart kept racing so I did my best to 'settle myself down' using meditation, breathing, etc. without much success.  I finally decided to say the rosary...that did it!  Each time I'd get up to use the bathroom during the night, I'd go back to where I thought I left off.  I think I maybe got through the whole rosary.  Wow, that's sure different for me.

This morning I looked through a magazine, "Backyard Living" that I picked up at a doctor's office. It was filled with great easy planting ideas for spring...a real inspiration. Yes, this weekend we go on daylight savings time--days are flying by. Whew!  Halfway through...I'm considering looking at stopping at 4 rather than 6. We'll see; I don't need to make that decision now.

Thanks for your wonderful prayers and uplifting words. They're an incredible source of hope and love for me.  Josetta

"Sometimes I have to be grateful for the graces I receive, even if they aren't exactly what I had in mind."

Treatment 3: Day 3

Hi All,

I'm doing well, even better than last session on my third day. I had my chemo treatment on Thursday. I had an allergic reaction to the Taxotere drug. I was talking with Don and felt like the band from the cold cap that was under my chin was getting tight. Then I started to get pain from my crotch upward through my abdomen. I realized that something was happening and Don got a nurse who came in right away and stopped the drug. The pain also went to my back and was very strong. I was injected with benadryl and a steriod which stopped the escalation of the pain and gradually diminished it. Fortunately, a solution came before there was time for panic to set in!  Wow, again I'm impressed with the staff, their attention and knowledge.

After waiting about twenty minutes, the Taxotere was started up much slower along with a saline solution. All went well after that. Cathy and Don were there to change my cold caps every 30 minutes. Cathy had a one-hour conference call with work during that time. Thank goodness for technology (and her knowledge of it) -- and her ability to multi-task!

I was given a Dammit Doll: "When you think you want to climb the walls or stand right up and shout, Here's a little DAMMIT DOLL you cannot do without. Just grab it firmly by the legs and find a place to slam it. And as you whack the stuffing, just yell, "Dammit, Dammit, Dammit!" I could have used this a month ago!

When we got home, Nance joined us to learn how to put on the caps in case Cathy was ill or unable. As she left, Cathy's friend, Amy, joined us to learn, too.  By 8:00pm when we finished, we all were tired.

Yesterday went well with a long-time friend's son visiting to see if Don could do some patent drawings for an incredible invention that he's working on. It was a delight to spend  time with him. I've known him since birth but as he's grown, only had the opportunity to be with him in group settings. He's one good person with his head on very straight and a wonderful heart.

I went to the doctor's office for my usual day-after Neulasta shot that helps my bones to produce white blood cells that boost my immune system. So far it's been working well.  This time my hemoglobin was just out of the low range. I'm eating lots of protein to maintain my energy (eggs, poultry, meat, dairy, beans, nuts, fish and whole grains).  It's something that can gradually get worse with each treatment that I want to avoid.

Later in the day, our good friends joined us for dinner. We had a wonderful time together chatting and catching up with our lives and viewed Donny's photos of Autorama on our big TV screen.

Today, I'm doing well. I'm avoiding Aleve and Motrin if I can, since it can be taxing to my liver. I'm feeling okay even though many patients complain of aches and pains from the Neulasta shot.

My friend, Sharon, sent me a book called, "My Healing Companion". It says Compliments of Roche Laboratories, Inc. on the back.  I went online and found that it is only available through a Roche rep. I'm going to mention it to my doctor's staff so that they can get it for other patients. It's a book for journaling and exploring thoughts and feelings with introductions on Why Me? (positive turning points in my life), I'm Overwhelmed by Anger (my anger, sadness and fears), I want to be Positive (turning negatives into positives), Whom can I Talk To? (who can I ask?), etc.

It's very well done with beautiful prompts and lots of room for writing, drawing and exploring. I look forward to using this journal to help me learn more about myself and to heal me in many ways.

Thanks for sticking with me through my journey. Keep sending your prayers, healing energy and good thoughts. They are (along with you) what are keeping me going so well.     hugs,  Joey/Josetta

Test Results

Hi All,
I saw my oncologist on Monday to get my test results from Thursday's ultrasound and blood work.  The ultrasound of my abdomen showed all my 'parts' to be normal in size, texture and no stones; medical term is: abdominal organs are "unremarkable". They looked at my liver along with my pancreas, bile duct, aorta, kidneys and spleen. That was GREAT news!

My blood work that was taken last Thursday showed that my Total Bilirubin and Albumin were well within normal range (they've been normal since I began).  My Alkaline Phosphatase has dropped considerably, almost to the normal range.  My AST (formally called SGOT) has also dropped to almost normal range. My ALT (formally SGPT) has dropped but is still slightly elevated. My doctor says the Taxotera chemical that is given to me during my treatments is most likely the culprit. (NSAID's can also cause liver damage. I took two Aleve and three Motrin pills this past three weeks--not enough to do damage.)  We decided to postpone my 3rd chemotherapy treatment to Thursday (tomorrow) believing that by then all my tests would continue to decline and be in the normal range.  Dr. Jasti will closely watch my liver enzymes following this treatment.

I needed a few days to 'get my head in order' for another treatment. Of late, I've been reading a lot of information about alternative and complementary medical treatments for cancer. In the process I read a lot about how chemotherapy 'poisons'  the body. I also read much about how to build up my body and take advantage of eliminating cancer cells in the body through chemotherapy. This evening I plan on taking time to do some imaging of what I expect my treatment to do.

I've been using rushing water as my image; seeing the water wash away any cancer cells that might be in my body. Shooting or killing cancer cells didn't work for me; I've gotten passive in my old age and find those images to be combative and hostile--not my way of solving problems. All the small pebbles (cancer cells are being washed away) and the larger rocks (my other cells) are being smoothed and polished.

In my last post I mentioned that I had a new hair do. I met a long-time friend over the weekend and she wasn't sure it was me, although she did know me when I had short hair.  I had Don take a photo of me, so if you see me somewhere, you'll know it's me!  

A wonderful friend, Sandy, who lives in the U.K. sent me a calendar that she made for 2011.  I thought you'd like to read some of her comments for March:  "Drink champagne for no reason at all."  "Learn to laugh at yourself" and "Give warm hugs!"  She also added this one by Lady Bird Johnson, "Where flowers bloom, so does hope."  Spring is coming, plant some seeds/flowers and time to renew your hope! I believe that there is no such thing as 'false hope.' Go for it!

Sandy designed and compiled the calendar for NATANDY Fund (http://www.natandy.com) which she and other family members established in memory of her daughter and son-in-law (Natalie and Andy) who lost their lives in the 2004 Asian Tsunami while on their honeymoon.  The funds are used to support the rebuilding of the lives of the people of Thailand, particularly those on the Island of Phi Phi, and with special emphasis on helping young people.

I'll leave you with the words on the back of the calendar:

Happiness is a journey, not a destination...

   For a long time it seemed to me that life was about to begin--real life, but there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid.

   At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life...  This perspective has helped me to see there is no way to happiness, happiness is the way. 

   So treasure every moment you have and remember that time waits for no one. -Souza

Thanks to all of you for your prayers, good wishes, healing energy and cards and emails.  It's all of you who are carrying me and making my journey so very pleasant. Blessings and hugs,           Joey/Josetta